Friday, October 23, 2026

● Movie Review: NOAH (2014) [The Worst Bible Movie Ever Made!]

A friend of mine raved about this movie.  But when I finally got around to watching the movie “NOAH” (2014) starring Russell Crowe, it was disappointing.  I'll be gentle to start this review.  Let's just say it was NOT Mr. Crowe’s finest hour.  Having watched "Gladiator (2000)," I had very high expectations.

Noah's ark free image on Pixabay

🍿🎥✮⋆˙
The IMDb rating is 5.8 out of 10 stars.  I often check IMDb ratings for contrast and comparison.  For the record, I rarely agree with the IMDb ratings.  I disagree with this rating.  I would have gone much lower.  I gave it an "X" rating.  (See below.)

One would think that after the remarkably spectacular film “Gladiator” (2000), Mr. Crowe would be able to pull off anything by way of acting. I was very curious about the film because a fellow freelance writer had published a review that piqued my interest.

NOAH (2014)

♦ ♦ ♦

So! As is my habit when Mr. Sandman refuses to pay me a visit and put me to sleep, I decided to watch a 2 or 3-hour movie to see if that would work. It worked!! That ludicrous production of the well-known Bible story of Noah and his family, the building of the ark, and the Great Deluge wore me out!!

Fifteen minutes into this talkie and the little voice in my head whispered a prediction: ‘Psst. It’s not going to get any better than this.’

It didn’t!

Even though there was a beautiful rainbow at the end, this movie totally sucked! In fact, the rainbow was the only scene that redeemed this cinematic calamity. It symbolized that this disastrous movie had ended and, hopefully, that the producers, the director, and everybody else who contributed to its release will never do it again!

Watched it on Netflix. Gave it 1 star. Hated it!

Netflix didn’t have MY rating system; otherwise, I would have given it 5X.

1X = Bad

2X = Really bad

3X = Ridiculously awful

4X = That wasn’t even entertainment

5X = Dig a hole and bury it!!

Rarely do I ever feel compelled to give a movie a rating, on record, to warn others! But for the first time, the thought of actually creating a brand new rating system came to my mind.  This movie was absolutely, without a doubt, thee worst Bible movie ever made!

It was not added to my list of "old but gold" movie gems.

No comments:

Post a Comment

TOP 10 Korean Dramas of ALL TIME


JOIN THE POPGEEKS FORUM TO DISCUSS YOUR FAVORITE KOREAN DRAMAS


K-drama not streamed in your country?
***Best VPNs to watch Korean TV: NordVPN OR ExpressVPN

About Me

My photo
Work-at-home professional since 2007.

Treathyl Fox aka Cmoneyspinner – Home Business Entrepreneur.  Think. Dream. Focus. Believe in yourself? Hire yourself! Be your own boss! Do it! Self-employed and loving it!   ♦ DISCLOSURE: In compliance with FTC rules and guidelines, be advised that some links shared via this websites might contain affiliate referral links which means commissions might be earned if product sales resulted from your click-through to the vendor’s website.

♦

DIDN'T FIND WHAT YOU WERE LOOKING FOR? SEARCH THE ENTIRE WEB